“We live in a society of victimization, where people are much more comfortable being victimized than actually standing up for themselves.”
― Marilyn Manson
At the moment, I’m going through a rather challenging phase in my life. I’m facing difficulties in my career, I’m still single while my friends are happily married and starting families, and within my family, I often find myself feeling quite isolated, with only a few close individuals who truly understand me.
I also came across another individual who was going through a tough time on social media. Here, let’s call him, Roger. Interestingly, despite the fact that he works in the tech industry and lives far away abroad, we discovered we have a lot in common.
However, that was only during the initial few weeks. As time went on, he began opening up gradually, and the words he shared with me were not exactly what one would want to hear on a daily basis. Being a refugee, he consistently expressed his frustration about the challenging situation he found himself trapped in.
He felt like his life was a complete failure, and he saw no reason to continue pursuing his profession. Every time I attempted to provide encouragement, urging him to hold onto hope for the future and take concrete actions that could make a positive difference in his life, his responses were consistently negative. He would say things like “No,” “It’s impossible,” and “There’s no way I could do it,” and so on.
Naysayer:
A naysayer is essentially a dreamer who has abandoned their own aspirations, and they often make an effort to bring others down with them. Don’t be one of them.
Naysayers are a common sight in various places, and Roger was a prime example. From what I gathered from his story, his life wasn’t exactly a bed of roses either. However, I believe there’s always a solution to such challenges, but he didn’t seem interested in even trying to find one.
Over time, as I’m not much of a texter, I grew increasingly uneasy communicating with him through text messages. Eventually, I had to be honest with him and express my true feedback, saying, “I can’t be your therapist.”
That turned out to be my final message to him, and I never received a response.
A victim or a problem solver?
Let me pose a question: There are two kinds of people – those who see themselves as victims and those who consider themselves problem solvers. Which type of person do you aspire to be?
It’s always easier to victimize yourself and, in the end, settle into your comfort zone, even though it’s not where you truly want to be. It’s about becoming comfortable with complaining about what you lack and the goals you haven’t yet accomplished.
And that’s not what you desire, is it? Life presents numerous potential creative solutions to every problem you might face. It’s certainly simpler to say, “That’s impossible,” because these naysayers are typically individuals who couldn’t accomplish it themselves or maybe failed in the past. Consequently, they make a strong effort to persuade you to abandon your aspirations.
A touch of creativity can go a long way. Dare to think outside the box. You don’t have to settle for being a loser, and there’s no need to constantly chase being a winner. Instead, aim to be a game changer. In life, it’s not always about being the best; it’s about being the only, setting your own unique path and goals.
Creative outlook:
If the grass on the other side is greener, water the grass you’re standing on. When faced with a substantial array of problems, break them down into manageable pieces and tackle them one at a time.
If you find yourself facing career challenges, concentrate on enhancing skills that align with your future objectives. There’s no need to hurry; take your time. Every single day, plant seeds in your life and patiently wait for the right moment when they mature into a crop you can harvest.
Afterthoughts:
understand that life can present considerable challenges, but there’s always a potential solution to your problems. You’re not alone in this; we’re all in it together. Let’s join forces and strive for our happiness.