“The important thing in life is not what you get but you throw out”
― Saul Leiter
Happy New Year!
So, this is the first post of this year. For all of us, 2020 must have been a difficult year in every aspect. For international friends, 2020 could have been a memorable year for my country, Japan, especially because of the Olympic games. “2020” is such a nice round number and must have been a historic point in our history.
However, thanks to the Chinese cover-up of coronavirus that fueled the world pandemic and WHO’s questionable approach to the situation, all major global events were canceled, including Tokyo 2020.
But don’t get me wrong, I’m actually not that upset about the Olympic cancellation. If anything, I don’t have any positive feelings about my native country as well as our neighbors, such as China. Every government sucks. And when it comes to politics and nationality, things could get ugly.
As I titled my blog Canvas of Dreams, it should have been a place where I can share some good aspects of our lives with my photography and writing. It, however, is becoming a lot harder to kindle my inner passion to write about the positive possibility of life. It’s particularly because of my mental health crisis.
I used to be able to share my ideas about life and happiness in general. Ideas about how we can consort with our difficult past and live the present moment to begin again. I was full of ideas and it was almost unstoppable.
But nowadays, due to a constant surge of traumatic memories that keep overwhelming me, I’ve been struggling with the past refusing to let me go. Yet, I’ll never allow my wounds to permanently transform me into someone I’m not. I can’t change what happened, but maybe I can change how I react to it. And this idea could be applicable to you all.
Ideally, we should live in a world where everyone can reach their happiness. But our actual world doesn’t work like that. Our reality isn’t that clean, and there are a lot of people who unfortunately have been fallen into the dark side. There always are difficult people to consort with.
My mental health is undermined particularly because of my experience with difficult people. They were my classmates in my college, my colleagues, my supervisor, and some stranger who intentionally bumped into my shoulder and directed his hostility towards me. What goes around comes around. I don’t intend to take revenge on them because I know it’s nothing more than a waste of time.
As I mentioned earlier, I can’t change what happened. But I can change how I react to it. And if you are in a similar situation and suffer from your past traumatic experience, try shifting your focus on your dreams. I know I’m not a psychiatrist, but I dealt with my difficult days by accomplishing some of my goals one by one. I’m still struggling to fight with my past refusing to let me go. Yet, I just want you to know that you’re not alone.
Lastly, it’s okay that you can’t accomplish everything at once. Concentrate on the essentials and get rid of the rest.
Step by step, let’s build our lives together. Let us begin…
